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24 October 2011

So I got to this part...

...to the things what I never really wanted to do, but how the time pass by in this dark part of my life I need to do things what I truly never wanted to do.

I announced on my Etsy shop already, I am closing down my main shop for good this time and how I feel now, I don't think I will ever reopen it again.
It's makes me so sad, but I tried everything to keep up my Etsy shops, but I lost my passion to create, maybe God don't want me to create anymore...I really don't know..anyway this is how I feel now.
I waited long enough to get back to my work to design, but I totally lost my passion.
I already closed my supply and wedding shops down on Etsy and I will close my main shop on the 10th of November 2011.
I am not sure about my Etsy painting shop yet, I think I will keep that open for a while.

I had the first divorce court hearing on the 22nd of September and the ex promised front of the solicitors two weeks before the court hearing when we had a meeting, to pay me out to move out from my house with the kids and he will keep the house, car..etc. He promised he will pay the child support backdated to April 2011 what he owe for the kids.
But as always he lied again and changed his mind the next day.
So the situation is, he do not care about the kids anymore, he wrote it down for me and his son a few days ago.
He want money from me and he is not willing to pay the child support (he only transferred 400.00GBP in September to my bank account since April, but I think he only done that one of his weak moment, I bet he already regret it).

He still blackmailing me with all kind of things and blaming me for divorcing him, he just can not get it in his sick brain I had enough how he was hurting me physically and verbally since we got married, and since I found out five months ago he have a pedophile interest (please read my earlier blog post Not Affraid) and he cheated on me since we got married, I have nothing to do with that person anymore.

So, I have to sell the house to make money to help me start a new life with my kids.
I put up my house on auction on Ebay and on one Hungarian Estate Agency website for sale.
The house price is really low at the moment in Hungary, so it will be a bargain for someone.

It's hurts me to sell it, but I have no other option to cut all the ties with the ex and make it possible for start fresh with my two kids.
It was so hard to write that much today, because I am feeling so depressed about everything, but I am hoping to sell my house will ease all the pain what I was living in for 15.5 years.
To sell the house will close down a very sad part of my life and start new and be me again...

PS: I just wanted to say thank you for everyone who wrote to me a private email (marica.art@btopenworld.com) and on my Etsy shops. Sorry, but at the moment I don't feel to write back to anyone. I will later on, when I feel a little better.
I am sorry, I am not ignoring anyone, I just feel so down to write in the last months.
Please this don't stop you to write to me, because your messages give me strength to keep going...
Thank you!